Life Feels So Empty Right Now...

Where are you?'Cos I need you.

Jamming day 3...pukes...

wow 3rd day of jamming.why'd u wan another day of jamming jeffrey???!in de end also nobody jammed much,which was wtf.should've brought home stuff yest then practice at home today.would be more efficient for "solo training", which u guys said today was.in de end it's all playing games and all...

at least i think i've improved quite a bit =)

See brand new what I can do

Flashback!

OMG i was so bored i went to check out my old shows.haha it's damn lame now but it sure was cool to me back in those days...

Big Bad Beetleborgs

Superhuman Samurai Syber-Squad

Masked rider

MMPR

street sharks

Captain Planet

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

VR Troopers

Mummies Alive

Biker Mice From Mars

Jamming day 2 ...zzz

jamming was cool, think i'm kinda complete with love story, or almost.haha eh SH why nvr drum sia...haha and today's session was damn hilarious 'cause we were damn bored and doing crap stuff.

tmr jamming day 3...hardcore...

damn tired.gonna sleep soon...wanna chat online a bit more! haha

When will I finally see you...?

zzz...

yesterday jamming was fruitful.haha now just gotta figure out the last part of the song "You belong with me"!haha damn tired still, and jeff wants to gym at 9 today,which is kinda in 5mins time.that's DAMN early,so i think i'll give it a pass.i can do my own effective gyming at home,which is kinda usual for me haha wonder wat i'll do today?maybe rot at home AGAIN

damn if i had the money i'd go clubbing or sth.damn sick of doing nothing and the same old stuff.i wanna go shopping, or to the beach, just sth fun.but everyone's always busy, which makes me wonder...maybe it's time to move on. sick of running on a treadmill, i wanna start running down a path in life

having no money sux

so tempted to smoke -_-

i'm now at a crossroad, wondering whether to sink into my sins or be the good guy

One day I'll reach my limit

Poker Face

Played poker like crazy last nite until i couldn't take it anymore,so i threw in everything and lost it all XD awesome dinner and cr came damn late.we watched some damn funny vids on youtube and the log cake was just awesome!managed to catch some sleep this morning, gonna jam later! miss my guitar damn i'll bring it home later. and thanks for the...present LOL carrying that box around damn paiseh sia am i suppose to use them?!haha

And we both know
You're everything I need

Never Again

I've reached breakpoint,

I've reached the point of no return.

The past is now forgotten,

The future undecided.

When one reaches his limits,

Even God cannot save him.

I tried my best to stand my ground,

But my knees have finally crumbled under the pressure.

If I can ever find you,

Maybe you can save me from myself.

Because from today onwards,...

...I can no longer feel genuinely happy,

I'll never smile again.

Santa's little whores

heh yest was forced to go for some damn chrsitmas celebration in camp that we specs HAD to go for god-knows-wat reason and i hated it.i just hated the entire thing.not the food(de rest were spamming the mango log cake lol),not the music(gawd i love their playlist),but the fact that 20 ladies,think maybe 1-2 years older than me, being in the party dressed in sleazy dresses and santa outfits.maybe i was disgusted that army always get some girls to appear in parties to satisfy their horny little things they call manhood, or maybe i was disappointed in good-looking girls willing to get paid to be the eye candies for 30-40 something yrs old "matured" men, or maybe it was becos of the pain my wisdom tooth gave me.either way, i just hated it and slept at 9.30,which was damn early for me.

you could tell that those girls were not to keen about doing it.they just wanted to get over and done with it.the worst part was when the girls were suppose to dance at the front like some clubbing scene and pick some guys to dance with them.i nearly got dragged out, but i rather not,though it was rather tempting becos that gal was kinda the gal i'd like. but to make those girls dance there like some sleazy club...FUCK SICK BASTARDS. fortunately most of the girls managed to escape it, and they went to grab some food instead.you should've seen the fear in their eyes when they had to go and dance.

and to make it worse, i dreamt of a gal who i added on FB but i'm not actually frens with her.in de dream i was wooing her and building up our relationship when she suddenly disappeared.which,when i woke up, was like, "why the F am i having this dream"

took leave on next wed.poor kelvin didn't have that 1 more day leave.sorry man.

even the turkey feels cold to me now...

Merry X'mas i guess

Guess who's alone this Christmas?

Cheezeburgers!

So sick...

..of everything.

...of waiting to go clubbing but it never comes

...of people who act just plain stupid thinking they know what they are doing

...of rotting and thinking about how to kill the weekends I've yearned for during weekdays

...of trying to make ends meet, not just for me, but for everyone

...of being single and hating it

...of wishing the band can actually have a chance of going big

...of being entangled in life of PSP and other unnecessary stuff

...of hearing about lan gaming

...of being so disconnected with my family, who i see less than 24 hrs a week

...of having others' problems suddenly becoming my worries for nothing

...of looking at girls and wondering who's the one for me

...of being the fool

...of the thought of death and afterlife hitting me like I ran into a wall

...of wondering what kind of Christian I am, about my church, and my cell group mates

...of simply everything.

Just makes you want to scream, "F*** IT."

Christmas presents = K.O.

well,finally gotta go FB after 5 days w/o a computer. gawd i can't believe i manage to survive that.and this is gonna go on for a year more X(

just so tired from a day full of PSP and sleeping.haha and i got no idea what to do this weekend.

super broke.nvr been so broke, or more like nvr in a situation where i needed so much cash.

got my 1st potential job from de modelling agency!but de casting was on thursday, which means i couldn't go becos i'm stuck in camp.dammit!!!

Thurs is a Christmas celebration with de gang!but must get a gift...damn dunno wat to get, and i've got no cash...die die die...

maybe i'll just spend christmas collecting donations for salvation army.go ring the bell and wear the santa hat haha

All I want for Christmas is you...

The Story of Your Life

The story
Of your life is so twisted
'Cause someone out there is missing
Everything you do

You're wasted
Nothing ever really makes sense
If you keep searching you'll find me
Hidden inside you

Leave behind your troubled eyes
See brand new what I can do
Just say yes if you really want me to

We can stay like this or go, go, go
We can take it too fast or take it slow
We can spend our lives oceanside
Or count the stars in the desert
On a magic night
You can lie awake in bed
Or come and sleep with me instead
If you give me one chance to take your hand
I'll fill the empty pages as you write
The story of your life

The story
Of your life is unwritten
So put me down as your ticket
Don't even fight it

You're shaking
You're not sure of the ending
But let me be the beginning
Just put it in writing

Leave behind your troubled eyes
See brand new what I can do
Just say yes if you really want me to

We can stay like this or go, go, go
We can take it too fast or take it slow
We can spend our lives oceanside
Or count the stars in the desert
On a magic night
You can lie awake in bed
Or come and sleep with me instead
If you give me one chance to take your hand
I'll fill the empty pages as you write
The story of your life

This is now, no I don't mean maybe
Just wanna scream and call you baby now
Take a chance and call me crazy
Smile kid, there's only one way out

We can stay like this or go, go, go
We can take it too fast or take it slow
We can spend our lives oceanside
Or count the stars in the desert
On a magic night
You can lie awake in bed
Or come and sleep with me instead
If you give me one chance to take your hand
I'll fill the empty pages as you write
The story of your life

Fill the empty pages
Fill the empty pages

FotoshooT

well today went for de photoshoot and i gotta admit it was quite fun.haha went there 15mins late,thank god they weren't pissed off or anything.haha so i sat there waiting for my turn,and then this lady came out.she was in the process of doing her photoshoot,and probably was changing location to snap some pics.now she's older than me,and she's totally not my type,but when she came out her beauty just hit me with such a gr8 impact.haha she's not my kind of good-looking,but she was that gorgeous (at a glance). when she was done my turn came and i had to put on some make up stuff on my face.too bad i don wear contacts or i'd know wat was happening to my face.haha and i spent the whole photoshoot not wearing my glasses,so i was kinda like a blind bat.when the guy told me to pose this way and pose that way,i had to kinda squint.haha luckily this blind mice made it through.did 5 outfits today, gonna do 5 more in feb maybe.haha

tmr gonna celebrate jeff,kenny and xx b-day!haha gonna wish them midnite tonite.haha

ahhhh missed zouk out.haha not that it bothers me much.kinda getting a splitting headache.haha

I'll give it a shot because I've got nothing to lose

End unit life,start uni life pleez...

finally saw my bunk this week,and it's bloody dirty.the best part is i cleaned all tgt 2 damn bunks which are way too dusty and dirty.at least now it feels more comfortable and clean.haha

i have to say that 3DA life is quite ok so far.this week was full of nights out and canteen breaks that i'm sick of gg out at nite alr.haha even got to go outside mcdonalds for lunch on thurs XD and i'm still not used to this change in lifestyle.i'm no longer a SCT,at the bottom of the food chain.haha at least now i'm in the middle.but 3DA is gonna have loads of stuff to learn,and it's gonna be a busy yet challenging life.

DAMN the photoshoot ppl told me stuff to bring only yest,when the shoot is today.where can i get blazers,leather shoes and contact lens so last minute?!!!ok contact lens is i lazy go make so that can be counted as my fault,but blazers?!i'm not that rich,and i'm alr paying some huge sum on this thing.haha hope it goes well today...stupid pimple...

OMG we the kings new album and lady gaga's fame monster are just awesome!haha

What do I do to make sure everyone's happy,where nobody suffers alone?
Why does it always seem like it's my fault?
Why do I always feel useless?
What can I do to help?




Leave behind your troubled eyes
See brand new what I can do
Just say yes if you really want me to

This isn't how it's suppose to be...

Today gym failed becos marine parade gym must have annual membership.den went to jam...

we've gotta spend more time playing music tgt than individual practices...

How can it be my closest if it's not even that close enough?

I can't be bothered to post any pic below tonite...

Why can't we just restart life like a video game?

We need glue like you to make us stick together

Welcome back Sihua!

sihua returned to us last night!haha the day started (for me) when i met jeff,cr and rosh at katong to get jeff's guitar.then we went cr's place to rot till 9pm. i tried playing de song w/o looking at my guitar at all.haha!xx dropped by and we all headed to airport for dinner at BK before gg to terminal1.haha we seriously didn't know where to go becos we were not sure which flight SH was on.but one thing led to another and we waited at T1.haha

sihua!think you ate too much nutella.follow us gym later haha

xx thanks for chatting haha we should meet up more often Gawd we hardly meet up seriously

Cheeseburgers we're gonna gym and jam in de afternoon!


Sleepy...

3SG reporting!

today is 1st day in 3DA unit!and i'm 3SG alr!haha nothing much to talka bout de place becos i booked out at 10am!!!haha awesome long weekend man!haha

went to check psp,turns out MS is de problem so i got a new one.

wanna club!butter factory is where the REAL clubbing gals are,so i wanna go there!let loose a bit now that she's out of my interest.haha

gonna practise my guitar tmr,and GYM!gotta start working on my body.haha

GAWD damn it barber wth you doing?!!!


Heaven can wait up high in the sky
It's you and I

Happy Bird-day to me

haha didn't go clubbing 2day, becos de course most not gg and i'm having a splitting headache now.MEANS I MISS MAMBO NITE!all those ladies on the dance floor...not that it really matters much anymore.haha but seeing all those wishes on FB really made my day!haha who needs presents when frens are the best kind of gift there is?haha wish it felt more like a birthday though...it felt like an average usual day this year...

thx for hearing my crap yesterday,made me feel much better to let it out haha

well,what do i wish for this birthday?
YOU,whoever you are,whereever you are.

counting down to sat!

tmr i'm gonna become 3SG Jason Ng! =)


Happy birthday to me...

Funny pic!

I just had to post this. i'm de right most guy.u see, we planned to all raise shirts.then last second everyone decided to fold arms instead(except me).gawd i can't stop laughing when i see this pic!!!haha

Cohesion day!

Today was cohesion day at downtown east.SO DAMN FUN,much better than anticipated.haha wild wild wet was ok only, only 2 rides worth doing again and again.haha and there was this one good-looking lifeguard,but too bad her shift ended.haha and joel triewd to get 4 girls to ride with him and i,but REJECTED.haha i ws kinda his wingman,and de excuse about de 6-person ride was my idea.haha too bad they left, becos joel wanted to go for round two.haha

after wild wild wet was suppose to rot until dinner, which was 6pm.so we had 2 hours to kill.nearly played para para...and joel and i got owned by DDR.haha died in 30 sec!haha fortunately isaiah suggested gg to de beach, where we pretend that we rented a bbq pit just to lepak.haha finally we decided to cycle, which was awesome.we took photos like some cam whores(seriously omg) and i recorded a video of them playing at de playground.haha and joel, isaiah and i were cycling half naked.a group of girls were giggling at us when we cylced past them.haha cycling was fantastic =)

finally we had dinner at NYNY.de chicken paragaima or watever was awesome.but i was damn full for who-knows-wat reason that i gave away de fries.haha and we posed with Kishan's cool glasses.BOOMZ!haha

tmr's my b-day, and i think i'll hit de clubs with my coursemates XD


DDR=Half Minute Game Over



52nd ADSS RBS Course(de MFM group)




I don't love you, like I did yesterday

PSP problem AGAIN!

Argh!my psp seems to be giving me more problem!my monster hunter datat got corrupted twice!and my memory stick sometimes can't be read properly by my psp.looks like i gotta send it for repairs again, but it's $40...maybe i'll quit psp for a while...

How to fix a broken heart

Well, my "inside info" :P kinda told me that it's no chance to win that girl, so i'm calling quits. sure it stings, but love is never easy. if love is being overshadowed by wealth and status, so be it. maybe I'm just the stupid fool who believes in REAL love for a person...

haha so i'm gonna go back to the clubbing scene, not becos i'm some crazy guy,but to distract myself from the painful truth of my life...

there goes my motivation in life out the window...



A broken heart heals in time,
and you get up to take a shot on love again.
But when love turns its back on you,
do you turn yours too?
When you fall too many times,
will you finally decide to stay down?

Behind the mask...





Happy 19th birthday, to foolish lil' me...

...

I'm so lost in Life right now...need some space to breathe and think...


I just want some alone time...
away from all my troubles...

Got a camera!

bought a camera!!!but too tired to blog about anything...goodnitez world.hope i'll be back to normal tmr!haha

The chances of winning her has just got even less...


If you know who she is, will you help me keep it a secret?


Music makes my heart beat, and you're like the music of my Life

today went to gym with jeff and kenny.my muscles DIED DAMN EARLY.still aching from previous gyming i guess haha then went to jeff's house to PSP (damn gotta cut down),and went to tampines to prepare for sihua's return XD

met cr for lan and dinner.i only played becos i'd die of boredom and exhaustion if i simply watched them play for 2 hours...and we laughed so hard during dinner i think my abs got training haha

gonna buy a camera at sitex tmr!!!if it's within my budget...



I can't go any further then this
I want you so badly, it's my biggest wish

My top songs currently:
-Cookie Jar - Gym Class Heroes
-Live A Little - Gym Class Heroes
-Remedy - Little Boots
-Whatever You Like - T.I.
-Good Girls Gone Bad - Cobra Starship

haha long weekend!ultimate happy!

today gonna gym!maybe sitex later,if not i'll go do some shopping!haha

i'm not interested in lan.so don bother asking me anymore.it's a waste of my time and money.cheap thrills.i'm a gamer no more.haha and i'll never love l4d2 like how i loved l4d

lol my coursemates suggest either clubbing on my b-day(which is LADIES NITE =D) or getting me a prostitute from geylang ROFL i saw for myself these poor gals at geylang when my fren gave us a "tour" in his ride...some girls really look damn good.why did they take such job?why not modelling?some really have de potential...if i ever encounter a prostitue,i'd want to interview her and ask about her "job"...then maybe i'll post online.really really sad to see them like that...what these poor ladies are gg through...and FUCK those sickos who gos to find these ladies


Baby, you could have whatever you like
I said, you could have whatever you like

Look Ma,no hands!

short week ahead!thursday evening booking out alr, and wed is night's out!

ah!!!PSP!come back soon!wanna rock band...

wanna buy a new camera soon...but no money.gotta use it for sth else :P

photoshoot!12 dec!12 noon!gotta rmb...so don make plans on 12 dec afternoon ppl XD

JAMJAMJAMJAMJAMJAMDAMMITJAMJAMJAMJAMJAMJAMJAM!!!




This is practically me right now,
when I think about you,
beautiful stranger...

shopped=satisfied

finally did some shopping!think i'll do it once a month or sth...haha.bought 2 jeans, 2 shirts, a hoodie, and a cool bag! lol spam spam spam

ate MFM again tonite.wth...maybe i'll go anti-fish this whole week XD

short week ahead!...i think

sentosa this friday?

gotta study for AR test dammit...

so sleepy but can't sleep...

need 2 fix my psp asap

dying to jam!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

need to contact modelling agency soon,set a date for photoshoot (if they remember me haha)

planning on how to welcome sihua back(she'll probably wish we weren't there)

gotta work some pecs,prepare for IPPT test...

2012 was quite good, but got me thinking about death all over again =(

must remember to take my weight.see if i lost any =)


Love sick

Heaven Can Wait

here's a song for the nights
i think to much and
here's a song when i imagine us together
here's a song for when we talk too much
and i forget my words

heaven can wait up high in the sky
its you and i
heaven can wait deep down in your eyes
i'm yours tonight
lay your heart next to mine
i feel so alive
tell me you want me to stay, forever
cause heaven can wait

here's a song for the one who stole my heart
and ran so far, that cupid couldn't catch her
here's a song for the kid who aims so high
he shot her down

heaven can wait up high in the sky
it's you and i
heaven can wait deep in your eyes
i'm yours tonight
lay your heart next to mine
i feel so alive
tell me you want me to stay forever
cause heaven can wait!

here's a song for the night
i drink too much and spill my words

heaven can wait up high in the sky
it's you and i
heaven can wait deep down in your eyes
im yours tonight
lay your heart next to mine
i feel so alive
tell me u want me to stay,forever...
cause heaven can wait!

cause heaven can wait!
cause heaven can wait!

Finish!

end of summex!!!yahoo!!!very close to 3rd sergeant rank and increase in pay $$$ but seriously summex wasn't tough...just a lot of rotting to do.i rot 75% of each day and thursday was de best...sleeping whole day at staircase.best kind of field camp i'd say...

gotta start gyming...grow some muscles XD

there were times when I felt like giving up...

but I thought about you and I fought on to the very end...

l4d 2? give me 1 instead.

ok yest tried l4d 2 demo at cr's place.haha i bought him lunch, and his mom was like,"chuan rui so fat alr, still eat these kind of food" in chinese.i told her "don worry i nvr upsize" ROFL

and i got a surprise when i saw deren there.hwe was watching HIMYM season4.i tried to connect to de wi fi at cr's place with my psp but FAIL.lol and cr still has 3 weeks before end of A levels...JAM!!!

so back to l4d 2.it has a ridiculous atmosphere.at least l4d was dark and kinda scary, but l4d 2 is so bright, so open, and de special infected gotten uglier.smoker looks like crap, boomer is practically useless in de demo,and de jockey is wth.de weapons are no big deal, but i have to say i LOVE the parang.slicing de heads off oncoming zombies is the new orgasm in l4d XD demo was frigging short and rather disappointing.the new characters are... :S though i've to admit de intro video was rather good.it looked damn realistic and de way the characters expressions are shown...beautiful.looks like america is catching up with japan's final fantasy kinda graphics haha

wasted time at the lan shop...haha told u guys not to go XDXDXD next time listen to lil' me plz.and there a lot of ah lians and no-lifers playing audition and maple.Good Lord seriously!come all de way to dhoby ghaut to play this kind of games...not like the rates are good or anything...

Rock Band Unplugged ftw!if i can't jam real in reality,i'll do it in-game =)


Oh, kiss me beneath the milky twilight
Lead me out on the moonlit floor
Lift your open hand
Strike up the band and make the fireflies dance
Silver moon's sparkling
So kiss me

Jason's back, tell a fren

BACK!thank God!1 more week of outfield crap and camo cream b4 i'm a (kinda) free birdy.haha actually wasn't that bad.each day simply deploy once and lay around de rest of the day.and i totally spammed milo powder.thank you obama!make the pre-summex end early!haha definitely got my vote next elections(in my dreams maybe)

need to hit de gym!feel so weak after no training for a week.gotta build some muscles somewhere ROFL

just so tired...

PS. Field rations sux.Go hungry instead.



How do you win the heart of a total stranger?

countdown to pre-summex and summex!shit shit shit wan time to fly at mach 3 or sth...haha another great obstacle in life...

...but all these obstacles are nothing to me, 'cause I'll overcome them to meet you at the end

I just received de news from lisa about rosh's loss...it's really a devastating blow.i hope rosh will have de strength in him to stay strong.if you ever need us we'll be there for you man...

guys,rmb what i said last week when you all insisted on me going clubbing?i told u guys that i wanted to spend time with my family becos you never know what happened...

once again i'm sorry rosh for what just happened in your life,and for the rest of you guys,every minute with your family is precious.treasure it instead of letting your pride or "independence" or watever your excuse is to stop you...

Up the (damn big) hill, down the slope

Wow this next 2 weeks are gonna be screwed up.OUTFIELD!another big uphill in life, but this time,i've got a motivation to drive me on.ultimate motivation!haha

actually hell started last week.this week had sunday confinement and today guard duty,so this week i was stuck in camp for 6 and half days.a guy can go nuts in such a situation.and only got a chance to use internet on monday,which means 5 days w/o FB and other wonderful internet sites...and to put a cherry on this wonderful dessert, a missile slammed into my right middle finger during a practical test yest.fortunately for the design of the system,there's a gap between the missile and the cradle,so my finger was merely crushed.if no gap,well,i'd only have one middle finger left.

gotta train my body!gonna hit the gym once my outfield is over!gotta work my shape...and define those 6 buggers XD after all, i don wanna look ugly in the photo shoot =)


It is simple things like this that I want to enjoy in my life...

The other me...

Have you ever feared death so bad that you feel so small and just wanna go one corner and emo?have you ever yearned to love someone so badly?have you ever hoped for someone to be there with you for the rest of your life?

I have. That's why ppl see me in a wrong manner.

"jan is sex-hungry".lol seriously i dunno where this came from.my bunkmates think me that way when I've NEVER ever talked about sex before.haha. And to me,i just wanna have someone important in my life, someone i can love and hold, someone who'd I'd die for and do my best just for her. I'm just the kind of guy who wants to enjoy married life(kids can totally wait,seriously).i mean,when i think of death, i feel like i plummet into this huge,black abyss of emptiness. the cold and loneliness eats into my heart, and my mind can simply steer off a cliff.If only there was someone there...to be the light in my life...and God doesn't count btw XD and why de hell do i look like i have sex b4...

one reason why i stop playing games alr becos i always feel like i wasted a few hours of my life,when all those precious minutes can be spent on sth better.i also hate death movies becos it just brings that death thing into my mind again (That's why i wasn't keen on watching Final Destination,CR gang haha)

Family is important becos nobody lives forever. One day, who knows who might just be taken away from you?Death is the point of no return.

One day i'll smoke,pierce my ear,and donate blood

If life's so boring, why not just end it?

I could have remembered to take back my psp if i followed ernest a bit longer

I could have spent some quality time with my family before my early book in

I could have caught up with some sleep

I could have been able to go online for a while or watch some TV

BUT THE NIGHT WAS FUCKED UP FUCKED UP FUCKED UP FUCKED UP FUCKED UP FUCKED UP FUCKED UP FUCKED UP FUCKED UP FUCKED UP FUCKED UP

FUCK EVERYTHING,SERIOUSLY

long time...

Feels like AGES since i last blogged.haha got a short weekend this week becos i failed a test,hence my sunday is gonna be spent in camp.training is getting tougher yet more fun...with such gr8 frens,even de sufferings seem small XD

tmr gonna meet up with de cr gang,gonna dine.maybe club after dat,but i don feel up to it becos of $.haha see how see how.just listening to my iPod makes me wanna move to de beat!!!

Tonight's the night
Let's live it up
I got my money
Let's spend it up

blogging and FB getting dull...

life's so aimless now...

i hate NS life,no motivation at all...

zzz...

Only idiots think they know me inside out

dbl-O round 2.

yest went dbl-O with my course mates!haha awesome music(as usual),but de gals were kinda older than last week.though i admit some were smoking hot with their bloody short,tight skirts.haha we tried to find some girls but all failed.only one fren managed to end up making out on de dancefloor.haha but it's not wasted becos i kinda accomplished sth last nite.next time i should go butter factory or sth, somewhere with younger gals who enjoy dancing with guys(and don bring their own guy frens).only took 1 shot!haha had a massive nosebleed halfway,i had to run all de way to de toilet.there was a trail of blood,and my right hand was totally bloody.think the bouncer got a shock.haha

Move while you’re watching me
Dance with the enemy
Ive got a remedy oh uh oh uh oh

ok i'm gonna try to make my psp(ver 5.50) be able to play a ver 5.55 game.haha all de best to me...

Somebody call 911
Shawty fire burning on the dance floor
Whoa

double-O my gawd

yest went clubbing with kenny and rosh and my ns fren daniel.ken rosh and i ate at Manhattan fish market or sth like that,which was awesome.love the fries.haha then we went to check out rebel and double-O.took us damn long to find double-O and turns out we walked past the freaking place.haha and de girls in de queue were hot!haha den we were deciding where to go,and so we went back to rebel to get daniel.we went double-O again,and turns out min. age is 20 but they let us in.after that we walked all de way to novotel just to draw money.s'pore should really have more atm machines around.haha

de club music was just awesome.love de music,love the dancefloor,love the girls,hate the fact i didn't get to dance with any.nvm next time i'll grow bigger balls,or simply drink more powerful drinks to get more high.we had total of 6 shots each and shared 2 jugs of dunno-wat.after clubbing i was kinda high,talking a lot of shit in the taxi home.and when i got home i had the worst sleep EVER because of my bloody headache.and i felt like puking but when i tried to puke nothing came out.lol i totally hate hangovers...

haha sorry about my previous post i'm just...getting worse...de smile is never 100% genuine,so don be fool my frens.

FRIDAY NIGHT.NO CHANGES SHALL BE MADE UNLESS I KENA CONFINED.haha

Friday night
Baby are you sleeping
Friday night
My heart is still beating
It's alright
Open up your sleepy eyes
Come alive, come alive on Friday night

The other side...

DeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeath
DeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeath
DeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeath
DeathDeathDeathDeathDeathHelp.DeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeath
DeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeath
DeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeath
DeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeathDeath


...isn't always very pretty

yest went to celebrate shuyun's birthday with de band!well,almost de entire band,plus rosh.haha then watched Funny People.de jokes were damn good,though de storyline is a bit weak.haha was this close to clubbing last nite,but oh well.this friday,no questions asked.haha

i'm so tired of blogging,need some motivation...

Being single sucks so much.Seriously.

last nite l4d till 2 plus.wth...cr we will NEVER play l4d with you until after A levels alr.ROFL

Thx jeff for de seasons 1 & 2 of How I Met Your Mother!now can finally enjoy more funny shit.haha

Tired..................................................

Friendship,it's how perfect YOU want them to be

thanks jeff and kenny for making mod psp!it's a great move!haha and thanks loads for de help with monster hunter.haha great time 2day dudes.

i was just thinking about all de frens in my life...so many new ones...so many various characteristics...so many changes...lost of some frens...when you look back,will you think,"I'm so glad i've frens like these in my life!"


when you look back next time,you'll realize that you'd never be where you are today if not for your frens in life.

omg i think i like my neighbour...i only recently realize how good she was.good height, nice figure, cute voice,and when she wear her glasses...wow.haha but there's this teeny weeny problem...wait for it...that i won't feel comfortable saying here.haha

wow weapons phase in camp makes me feel more like part of army then lecture school.haha damn shiok!even though my muscles are screaming in pain...

isaiah is some lovesick boy.help me!!!

i heard gay clubs got free entry.cr gang no money?then let's go there!haha on?anyway then de girls there will be up for grabs becos they go with their gay frens.haha cool idea huh?just suggesting...

Why I'll play all de way to kill a kirin...

omg de 2 epsiodes didn't work!need to find them again!help...

'coz I know you can't stay, so I won't be waiting, anticipating for the fall.
We had our time, baby, so I won't be waiting, anticipating for the call.
Turn it up, turn it up for the people that say "we're moving on and we'll be okay".
Turn it up, turn it up for the people that say "we're moving on and we'll be okay".

The post-monday bluez

well,today we jammed!!!and wow.4 hrs,played only thrice.specta...wait for it...cular!wish we practised more.haha can't wait for A levels to be gone.good riddance.hinders de band's progress.haha

met isaiah at PP 1st to check out some stuff.haha ate mac again for lunch.and we saw this ultimate hottie ang moh gal who was with...some average joe-kind of s'pore fellow.being rich is such a cheating advantage...

we chat with sihua on skype after jamming (btw i think cr's parents damn pissed that we jammed.good luck cr.haha).poor gal seems homesick.haha don worry we'll welcome u back to s'pore in 2 months!just cut down on oreos and nutella pleez...damn it is girls like you who should be sent for army training,not us guys...haha

l4d was a failure...becos i didn't get to crown a witch!!!damn sain...haha and we challenged this other group in de lan shop,glad we did well!!!though i really told jeff,kenny and cr to do loads of stuff.haha and de finale for death toll was damn funny,making our tank crouch in de water.haha

i just realize why getting a girl in uni is better,compared to when you and de girls you like are younger.imagine gg for a girl during sec or jc time,she'd accept ur wooing just to get a feeling of being "loved",which is actually temporary and poorly defined.their love is simply "being showered with attention and care".they do not understand wat love is,and their feelings on reach "like" level,not "love".
in uni,girls will start to mature,in their thinkings about relationships and what love really means.they realize to love someone will be to care for the person,be willing to spend her life with that man,and put his needs berfore hers.that is what loving someone really is,and the definition works both ways.so guys,when you meet this girl who,ina relationship,doesn't show this definition of love,it isn't.

Everything you say
Every time we kiss, I can't think straight
But I'm okay
And I can't think of anybody else
Who I hate to miss as much as I hate missing you

Conf!ned!

Well yest passed with the whole course rotting in bunk.we were suppose to clean the smoking area, though we are non-smokers...haha after that i just play psp de whole day.i only played monster hunter,and my frens were amazed how much stamina in playing at game.haha i'm sure you'd be just as motivated if you wan ur character to look hot.haha girls are my moti...wait for it...vation,duh.

de meals sucked totally,so isaiah and i ordered mac.i swear we were going nuts.we were laughing and making crap jokes.manage to make him try a bit of shuffling.haha.slept at around 1.30am,after killing another khezu...

gonna jam later!about time. gonna meet with isaiah 1st.haha

cr,get some amp to put in ur place.carrying amp to marine parade isn't easy man.haha

jeff!fortunately de surgery is no biggie,becos i can't bear to see poor kenny worry about you...haha kidding you two.don kill me.haha

rathalos is gay.help me.lol

"solemn low-five."

looks like i may be confined de whole of this weekend.meaning i can't go jam with the band...and even though i've alr decided to stop using vulgarities,i can't help it now...FUCKING school and de bloody 3G crap.i get confined for not greeting a captain and for failing some fucking test.seriously,this is ultimate BS. at least don confine us on sunday,you goddamn shithead bastards...sorry guys.lol it's not confirmed whether sunday confined too,but hope that useless piece of shit doesn't confirm it.

wanna go rebel,but some problems just came up.so looks like i gotta scrap de idea.wth...

Life's a big joke...

NPH rawks 2 de max!!haha love that guy!How I met your mother is simply a piece of art.haha

"Possimpible."

Kiss Me

Kiss me out of the bearded barley
Nightly, beside the green, green grass
Swing, swing, swing the spinning step
I'll wear those shoes and you will wear that dress.

Oh, kiss me beneath the milky twilight
Lead me out on the moonlit floor
Lift your open hand
Strike up the band and make the fireflies dance
Silver moon's sparkling
So kiss me

Kiss me down by the broken tree house
Swing me upon its hanging tire
Bring, bring, bring your flowered hat
We'll take the trail marked on your father's map

Oh, kiss me beneath the milky twilight
Lead me out on the moonlit floor
Lift your open hand
Strike up the band and make the fireflies dance
Silver moon's sparkling
So kiss me

Kiss me beneath the milky twilight
Lead me out on the moonlit floor
Lift your open hand
Strike up the band and make the fireflies dance
Silver moon's sparkling
So kiss me
So kiss me
So kiss me
So kiss me

well,yest suppose to study...but I WATCHED HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER INSTEAD!nearly de entire season 3.haha.so my test tmr is pretty screwed...haha omg NPH is such a great actor.if i ever acted i'd wan to be like him man,seriously!de show is simply hilarious!and i think cobie smulders look hot!haha but she's a mom now so...

wanna club this friday,so that sat i'll be totally wasted.then i can at least do sth during confinement...sleep!haha rebel anyone?i went to msg de gang "let's go rebel on friday." and deren's reply was "rebel against who?"haha forgot that he knows nuts about clubs XD

gonna report sick on wed,can't run 2.4 for ippt.haha

9

haha went to COMEX!wow i hate crowded places and suntec today was one example.but there were a lot of cool stuff, and de girls giving out flyers were just HOT.wish they'd give out telephone numbers on de flyers than de crap discount stuff.haha went with rosh,him getting a headset for gaming while i hunted for hard disk drive.haha was quite interesting,and i saw my master sergeant.haha didn't say hi,just quickly scramble away and maneuver through the crowd.there was one booth with some indians trying to promote de products by flashing them in our faces.bloody rude if you ask me.then there was a booth which hired loads of hot girls in jackets and short black skirts,but they don seem very bright.doubt they even understand what they are promoting(i didn't myself).and there were these 2 gals who we passed that giggled away,becos they pointed out rosh's nose.lol naughty naughty.bought my 500GB HDD for $116.haha

looks like i'll never meet you ever,unless our paths cross miraculously.

went cr's place after that,only to find jeff and kenny hooked to monster hunter.haha just some "upgraded" version of maple,that's all.haha cr has grown fatter i think.better start training boy.

headed to suntec for dinner at new york new york,where we shared yankee burger and meat platter.shouldn't have eaten mee goreng beforehand,but the food was nice :) jokhie came a bit later,and he kept hitting me.lol lost count how many times i said "stop touching me"

watched 9,which was rather cool but de ending was...anti-climax.maybe becos even at the end,humans are still extinct,so "so much for my happy ending".haha and there was one part at 1-hr mark when we tot de movie finish alr,and we were thinking "wth".haha

on de way back to city hall mrt got some gal drop her earring,and i tot maybe de guys behind me would pick up for her since by de time i noticed i alr walked past it.but those f***ers just ignored it.haha so i went back to pick it up and return it.jokhie was damn excited over it...though i don see why.haha i just returned de earring and walkked on.wat u wan me to say?haha anyway a bit too young lah.i think kenny and jokhie continued looking at de gal after that to see her response.haha

gotta find somewhere to practise shuffling!!!how how how?

AHHHH ADK test die alr...

can't seem to sleep,and my throat is getting worse.makes it even harder to sleep :/

where are you guys?why is CR gang mostly offline?!haha

i'm 62kg now...gotta bring it back to 58 or 59kg.haha

high up

i just realized why ppl think my pants are too high.turns out i'm rite,that i'm alr putting my pants at my hips,but just that i have a shorter upper body than others but waaaaay longer legs.so i'm taller than others but my waistline is higher.haha.so stop asking me to pull down my pants XD

Gonna

played squash at AFTC this week.damn fun!getting the hang of it quite fast.lol

gonna get confined next sat.wth...

tmr will determine if i get to ever see you, or continue living my life with that regret in my heart forever...

gonna buy external hard disk tmr if possible.not sure if i should go to Comex at suntec...haha

gonna practise my shuffling.

gotta study for ADK test,cramming this sunday...good luck to me XD

can finally use my hair wax again!woohoo for less strict rules!!!

couldn't sleep past efw nights,becos i kept thinking about tmr,and how i'd pull it off.

gonna play my guitar!miss it so much!and loads of songs i wanna try out!by muse,gorillaz,fall out boy,and loads more!haha tried check yes juliet by we the kings.

If I could sing a song, I'd play Kiss Me by New Found Glory

Quick Post

now in the library using com.today have some big talk in the audi so we SCTs are slacking till dinner!haha awesome man.gonna gym tonight,gotta build up my figure and lose weight.can't believe i'm 64kg now.wanna go back to 58kg.haha

Stop making plans start making sense

Ja(so)n

wow this whole week is slack in de school!haha loads of free study periods where we rot or play psp (though we should be preapring for next week's mega test).tmr ippt trial but i don think i can run.stupid mega mcspicy from sunday murder my throat.sinful pleasure.haha

think everyone wondering why i change my online name to jason.kinda...actually really really sick about my name being reacted in all ways other than positive.haha not like i'll hold grudge against ppl,becos i'd do de same to a name which is kinda wierd...i think.anyway i'm alr taking measures and stuff to prepare for uni.i'm gonna go into uni different from my old self.20 yrs old by then,i'm gonna grow up a bit.gotta start thinking bigger.so 1st move,stop playing computer games.haha it really wastes my time i think,when i can be doing better things.maybe SKY DIVING...haha kidding sihua pleez don kill me.haha.next i shall cut down on vulgar words.gals don like guys who scold such profanities like it's free,unless de girls are some kind of b****es.so yep,those are de only 2 steps i'll share.name makes 3.

gonna start practising my shuffling again.back2basics.

I'll never let you go
If you promise not to fade away, never fade away

haha went to lan with jeff,kenny and cr.L4D-ed.think we should join competition and try.heard from jeff that xx got her own L4D crew,and that we should challenge.well bring it on!!!if we lose..urgh let's not go that path.we can win!especially since now i can kinda do de witch-bitch slaughter-rape quite ok now(though i think i just got lucky).haha

got to cycle!feels good cycling after so long!haha.just hope i don get knocked down or sth...my cycling is quite hazardous XD

was trying to find seats at PP foodcourt(actually i was standing one side with my folded bike),and and kenny and edwin got owned by aunties.kenny was waiting for a family to finish,when this chinese auntie went to de table,ask de kid whether the seat is taken.de kid(primary sch kid)just shrugged and continued playing his psp.auntie 0 kid 1.then she don care just sit there until de family left.aunti 1 kenny 0.haha then i saw edwin go to some seat,and got chased off by an auntie who said the seat is taken.haha finally got our seats though.we joked quite a bit about gold bars boy ,aka jeff.i mean c'mon,how many families have houses alr ready for their kids.seriously,ultimate rich.haha

i downloaded de digital comics reader,and read ultimatum,which was rather brutal.it killed off nearly half the ultimate marvel universe in such brutal ways.the wasp was eaten by the blob,who got his head bitten off by a very huge,very angry giant man.magneto snapped charles xavier's neck,and ripped de adamantium from poor wolverine,who was alr blasted apart from cyclops eye beams and iron man's cannons.all that was left was part of his right arm.cyclops gets assasinated while giving a speech,and dr strange got squeezed to death.angel got gutted by sabertooth from behind,who also bit off one of his wings.beast and nightcrawler were killed in the tidal wave,and sue storm rejects reed richards.talk about screwed up...

need to buy external hard disk!com running out of space!haha


And I know that I have been forgiven
And I just hope you can forgive me too

Overstudy...

Wow.this whole week was studies all de way.lessons after lessons after lessons.and need to rush throught the air defence knowledge book.haha like school all over again,just that full day of lessons.and de toilet was cmi.the previous batch of trainees didn't seem to clean it!!!how i dread bathing there...haha and sleeping is very nice,the best thing to look forward to everyday.and this week my whole group didn't bother to do area cleaning,hence got a warning.haha de food is good though,and dinner always seem to be nicer than lunch.haha

next week must bring psp!dying of boredom in camp.and phone batt died on thurs.it suddenly drop from full to low on wed,which was like...wth.and reception sucked big time.haha

gonna practise guitar!!!Muse has inspired me!haha

Love & Hate,Past & Present

haha today i dug out this old book from primary school,where my frens would write some stuff down,like their favorite stuff,their closest frens(ranked Gold,Silver,Bronze.lol) and a small msg to me.haha how young and simple-minded we were when we were so young...and de 1st person to write inside(apart from me) was de 1st crush i had,and she called me her best friend...even now as i read it a familiar feeling of glee is felt.puppy love?God knows.and i saw de input by my best fren in primary school,and i recall how much we've helped each other,how much i failed as a good fren.i was never a good fren,until today.i always screw up at least once with every fren i have,even though i don realize it until it's too late.kinda makes me hate myself even more...I'm like the perfect imperfection of a person...

so today kinda spent time trying to find my old school frens on FB to add them...many couldn't be found.haha oh well...

i changed my FB name.I'm not gonna put my actual name there anymore becos i think I'm kinda "weird" enough.all i ever wanted was to be...i dunno...normal?average?haha so next time i'll use Jason,but de cr gang can stick to my actual name.haha 6 years of friendship and counting is ok.haha

i keep thinking of that day at the modeling agency,when i didn't have the bloody balls to just start a conversation with you.the signs were clear,but i was too damn ball-less to do anything.until today i still regret it,wishing i could turn back time.i look at girls every time I'm out,just to hopefully see your face in the passing crowds.another reason why i hate myself...

ordered mac today!it was raining,so i was lazy to go out for lunch.i used the online ordering system,and it's really efficient!technology is really amazing.haha and it said that my food would arrive in 1 hour's time,and i kinda understand,especially with such harsh weather.but the food came in...15 mins?! O.O that's fast food delivery for you.haha so there i was,sitting in front of my com enjoying the satisfying meal and watching x-men origins:wolverine.haha

so fast book in tmr...sianz...haha gotta start training.start to get my physique right.as sihua say,must eh...dunno wat your calibre!!!...watever that meant...haha(i interpret it as to make yourself more appealing to uni gals after NS XD)

playing ridge racer 2 on psp.lazy to play monster hunter unite.haha de drifting is simply "mind-blasting" haha

I can't seem to use italic again,so i can't put de italic msg i usually do in my posts.so i'll make do with standard font for this post...lol

I want to like what I see in the mirror...

Pondering...
Sometimes I wonder how much I've changed,
and whether is it for the better or for worse.
But whatever the answers are,
I know it's never enough.

Went to lan and watch G.I. joe with part of de cr gang today.haha lan was fun,with us owning de opponents.and jurassic park in warcraft was hilarious.now de game seems so much more simple.had de new spicy chicken burger at BK,bloody rip-off.ONLY FOR PPL WITH TEENY WEENY STOMACH!but de fries helped to make up for that small burger.haha G.I. Joe was cool,considering i knew nuts about it.i've haerd of it,but never had interest in it.

finally de blog looks ok!haha must be internet connection problem.haha

and i saw youtube videos of ppl playing bass guitar for 2 songs by Muse,"Starlight" and "Hysteria".i'm gonna learn to play them proper, then i shall have finally gotten the speed and technique right.

wanna buy some weights next month.still thinking about it...

since i can upload pics might as well write wat i wanted to post the past week.first is new wolverine and iron man anime!i saw de youtube trailers,and below are 2 pics.

de iron man looks plain awesome,but wolverine looks like ultimate crap.he's so skinny and look like from the wrong anime.just plain wrong man...

and maid-sama is so funny!it's really a nice romance/comedy manga,and seeing usui disturbing misaki is just hilarious!




I don't look at girls for fun,
I do it to search for you.